A tough semester..

what a tough semester that i have.. have to face financial problem, have to "see others face color".. yes, i know i am poor and you are rich.. but you also not better than me.. just borrow something from you and have to hear to many bad words from you.. then when you ask me to help you carry this carry that, have i say something bad about you.. use your mind please.. the action that you did, just make me feel you are selfish and untrustworthy.. and i won't trust you anymore.. i will not borrow anything from you again.. weather i have the things or not, no... i don't care about it.. as no one care about me.. just let it be..

live alone far from home and no one understand what i feel, what i need, and what i have done, is just the worst feeling that i have.. many people ask me that why you so thin oh..? at kk nothing to eat meh..? what can i answer.? can i just answer that yes, kk have things to eat but i don't have money to buy the food only mah.. when i said i don't have money, people look at me and thought that i just joking.. i never joke about it.. i really don't have money to buy food and goods for my daily need.. do you think i wish to become a thin man.? do you think that i don't want to grow fat..? you know nothing and please do not joke with me.. i never think about to diet.. it just that i don't have money to buy foods and goods.. everything in kk not as cheap as you thought.. you know nothing about me and please shut the fuck up.. yes, you guys are lucky that don't have to face any financial problems as you guys are rich and can go anywhere that you like.. and tease me as a village boy that know nothing.. just tease as many as you want.. when until i reach my limits, then you will regret what you have done...

First week for teaching practical...

Finally, i have pass through the first week of teaching practical.. maybe long time didn't wake up early during school time, quite lazy to wake up early in the morning.. thinking back of my past, i felt that i am really blessed that i can learn a lot during school time.. nowadays, the children are quite naughty and hard to control.. i thought a top school may have better quality students.. although some are very good in behavior and also attitude.. yet, still there are some who are very naughty.. yes, of course that they live in a comfortable way of life that just their parents raise their living.. i can't imagine myself in teaching this kind of students for the next 11 weeks.. everyday have to be very patience with them.. is it a trial that GOD want to test me..? i'm even more stress and mess up everything when i have prepared the daily lesson plan but mentor asking me to do in her job.. it mess up my flow of teaching.. yes, i know that i should be flexible all the time.. yet, when my lecturer who come to survey my teaching practical, i have to stick to the plan that i have prepared.. what i can do is just try my very best and let HOLY SPIRIT to lead me all the time..

oh ya...
Dear Heavenly FATHER,

i just want to take an opportunity to simply say thank you to YOU.. i have a great chinese new year for this year.. it is an awesome trip to mabul island.. snorkeling, eat and play.. i really enjoy the trip and it is really relax.. thank you that YOU provided me the chance to go to mabul island.. besides that, i do have a great time to enjoy with my family and friends during chinese new year.. it's been a long time.. although the happy moment passing very fast, still i would like to say thank you for YOUR blessing... LORD, please do continue to bless my family with Love, Joy, Peace, Hope and Health.. and please provided to my family everything that they need.. LORD, YOU are merciful and kind to us.. YOU loves us.. YOU protect us.. YOU are just everything to me, LORD.. i summit to YOU, my life.. guide me and lead me to walk in the path that YOU have prepared for me.. i am weak but YOU is strong, LORD.. strengthen me.. and provide me everything that i need, LORD.. in JESUS mighty name, i ask and pray... Amen..