一个小男孩的故事

有个小男孩，他从小就很顽皮。慢慢的长大，他也满听话。。虽然如此，也会有顽皮的时间。他很听爸妈的话。但是有一次，他却犯了很大的错误。他偷东西，被抓到了。虽然没事了，但是已经没有人再信他了。因为那个错误，他被抛弃。人的口中，终会说没关系。“我相信你”。但事实并非如此。因世人都是说的一套，做的另一套。

时间一年一年的过去，那个孩子也长大了。在长大的路程，他孤独的一步一步向前走。以为认识很多朋友，但是朋友们当他是傻瓜。利用他，摆布他，欺负他。他越来越觉得自己很没有用。很没有自信。

有一天，他的朋友有告诉他说“喂，有个女喜欢你。”他很开心。他们开始了关系。然后，朋友们又在他的女朋友面前说他坏话。害到他们终于分开了。虽然他知道发生了什么，但他也不能够去报复。

在两年后，那孩子有第二次的恋爱。在恋爱中的他，是么都是美好的。但是他不知道他被玩着。那个女孩是不喜欢他的，只是在玩爽。不到6个月的时间，他被抛弃了。他很伤心的离开。

很不幸运的事却一个一个的发生在他身上。每次他所喜欢的女生，都不喜欢他或有男朋友的。每一次的单恋，让他更无阻，更伤心，更没自信。就是这样，维持了5年的时间。

从此，他对自己更没信心。然后又发现，原来他没有朋友。没有一个真正的朋友。没有能够交心的朋友。朋友不喜欢他，家人很少关心他。每当他碰到难过的时候，却一个人的走过。想找个人来述说也没有，只好自己扛。孤独的过一生。

一個人（by Alison)

一個人久了，會懶得戀愛 。

一個人久了，朋友會越重要 。

一個人久了，會越來越喜歡聽歌 。

一個人久了，電話會常常忘記帶 。

一個人久了，對愛情會越來越挑剔 。

一個人久了，除了寂寞點外還是蠻開心的 。

一個人久了，會慢慢變得成熟起來 。

一個人久了，會比以前更重視更愛父母，更重視親情 。

一個人久了，對所有的節日大多沒甚麼期待 。

一個人久了，聽到看到別人一對對的很甜蜜，心裡多少會有些介意 。

一個人久了，會喜歡買很多無謂東西，帶自己去很多很遠的地方 。

一個人久了，會覺得無拘無束自由自在天寬地廣 。

一個人久了，愛情會變得越來越不重要，取而代之的是錢和事業 。

一個人久了，會越來越理性，越來越現實 。


總之，一個人久了，是很幸福的時光。

即使有一點點無聊和寂寞 。
但是游走在自己的街道上 ， 甚麼都可以無所謂， 沒有任何束縛 。

communication broken....

the disadvantage of using msn or fb is communication broken.... frens, u know nothing about me.... u dunno what the situation i am facing... so dun just simply blame me.... when the time i almost faint down u know..? when the time i'm very exhausted u know..? i do help u also when i am tiring.... what do i get for it...? burden is what i get... and now have to being blame and scold by u..? is that how u repay me..? help u, have to being scold... dun help u also being scold.... what the hack am i doing wrong..? u dunno the what actually is happening, so dun just simply put ur comment.... dun just simply blame ppl... u dun have the right to justify me....  u always gossip other ppl at the back... i surely u will gossip about me too.... u only know complain about other... but 1st, have u ever review urself before complaining other..? u're just terrible... i really dunno how to communicate with u... u frens always "give" and "let" u win.... it doesn't mean that i will like that also.... if u can't afford to lose, u're nothing but just make the shame to ur family and yourself.... u thought u are so good that everyone also loves u ah..? u are just nothing....

D select cafe....

have enjoy a lamb chop at a cafe namely D select... the food there also not 5 stars hotel recipe.. but is okay.... however, i like the salad there.... and also the environment there... so comfortable... it is a nice place to go for.... the food there nice in look and it also a great healthy food.... sure will go to visit again....

Reality and Dream....

Recently, one of my friend just graduate and started to work as an auditor.... before he get to work, i think he quite a good person... willing to help and sacrifice.... however, reality world is just and reality.... i finally found out that auditor will always count for everything to be just and right.... no more no less.... everything should be in calculation.... i am totally disappointed with him.... just hard to explain the feeling of me to him.... just for a feel ringgit, he can calculate till wanna die.... all things in his brain will be HIMSELF... which is i hate it... i hate people who are selfish....why can people be like this..? all things just think upon themselves 1st.... do they really so important..? they also God's creation.. how come will the reality world important than God's work..? just working for God also need to push to me..? i also a human.. i also will feel tired.... please dun think that u are worship leader than will be very important..... u just using ur mouth.... i have to play guitar and bass..... and drive here drive there.... do i no need concentration and strength... y every words out from ur mouth also got the word "i".... i just hate to hear that word from u....

not only that.... the other thing that u make me more and more hate u is, u are just a liar... u just an irresponsible person.... dun always present as a very responsible guy in front of me... from the way u speech and serve in ministry, i know who the person u are... always announce that how responsible u are... bull shit..... if u dun wan to serve, just say it lah.. no need to find many excuses to push all the work to me de..... just tell reverend that u dun wan to serve in this church la.... coward and bull shit..... always pretend to be 'holy man'.... surfing the Christianity web.... wan to be holy, go to sts study la... work as auditor for what.. u make me think that baptist member's just like u (bull shit)... everything from u make me sick..... 

sharing.... God teach us to share.... u..... just know about yourself...... even me as poor as i am, still i will share and spend someone drinks..... u, working 800 a month, no need pay rent, sometimes reverent treat dinner, every weekend free surfing net.... still u say no money...? f*** you..... i work as a part time worker, salary only few hundred also have to treat u eat..? what theory is that..? makan tahi lah.....

*I'M SORRY IF ANY OF THE WORDS ABOVE THAT I USED HAVE HURT ANYONE OF U WHO READ IT*

自私的人。。。

人真的可以为钱而不顾一切。。。。人真的可以那么自私。。。。把所有的都为自己想先。。。。每次都放自己在最前的位子。。。。就是那么的一点钱，就可以使到人的本性显现出来。。。。朋友，也是如此。。。。当讲到钱的时候，就会想自己的利益先。。。钱真的那么重要吗。。？钱也只不过是纸而已。。。。拿来换东西的纸。。。。为什么会有人为它而灭亡呢。。。？人真的很笨。。。为了纸而死。。。。为了纸，不理别人的生死。。。为了纸可以抛开一切人性。。。

明明很想哭，却还在笑…明明很在乎，却装作无所谓…明明很想留下，却坚定说要离开…明明很痛苦，却偏偏说自己很幸福…明明忘不掉，却说已经忘了…明明舍不得，却说我已经受够了…明明已经无法挽回，却依旧执着…明明知道说这样的话会伤害别人，却忍着心疼装作轻松的说出口…明明这样伪装得很累，却还得依旧…

很多的明知故犯的事，但却不能不做。。。。。做人，却不能够一个人吗。。？朋友，还拿来出卖的还是拿来做挡箭牌的。。？朋友，当有车撞过来的事后会推你出去挡车。。。当有难的时候，会救你帮他；但你有事的时候，却不理你。。。


好累了。。。。。

PC fair

昨天在pc fair度过了一天。。。学习了如何处sales东西。。。还有很累得出sales。。。一阵天没有的座下来，脚就快要断了。。。。晚上还要驾车回。。。有驾了45分钟。。。还要塞车。。。haiz。。。真的倒霉。。。。11点才能回家。。。

在pc fair看到很多美女。。。。。但全部都有男有。。。。但我却感谢上帝，因她们不是我女友。。。。我开始不太喜欢和人交往。。。静静的一个人的时候，我很舒服。。。上帝啊，虽然你吩咐我们需要和人交往，和人有关系。。。。。很抱歉，因为暂时我不能做到。。。我只是想一个人的过生活。。。可能是被伤害了，所以不敢了。。。也不要在被伤害。。。。。心流的血虽然是流不完，但我不想要它流了。。。。封闭了，就不能流。。。所以我选择连我一起封闭在里面。。。

A cry for help....

Lord God, my Savior, I cry out all day, and at night i come before YOU. Hear my prayer; listen to my cry for help...! 

So many troubles have fallen on me that i am close to death.... i am like all others who are about to die; all my strength is gone... i am abandoned among the dead; i am like the slain lying in their grave, those YOU have forgotten completely, who are beyond YOUR help. YOU have thrown me into the depths of the tomb, into the darkest and deepest pit. YOUR anger lies heavy on me, and i am crushed beneath its waves....

YOU have caused my friends to abandon me; YOU have made me repulsive to them. i am closed in and cannot escape; my eyes are weak from suffering. LORD, every day i call to YOU and lift my hands to YOU in prayer....

do YOU perform miracles for the dead..? do they rise up and praise YOU..? is YOUR constant love spoken of in the grave or YOUR faithfulness in the place of destruction...? are YOUR miracles seen in that place of darkness or YOUR goodness in the land of the forgotten..?


LORD, i call to YOU for help; every morning i pray to YOU. why do YOU reject me, LORD..? why do YOU turn away from me..? ever since i was young, i have suffered and been near death; i am worn out from the burden of YOUR punishment... YOUR furious anger crushes me; YOUR terrible attacks destroy me... all day long they surround me like a flood; they close in on me from every side.... YOU have made even my closest friends abandon me, and darkness is my only companion....
 

老夫子情歌 (Lao Fu Ze Ching Ge)

寂寞的我。。。

寂寞的我，突然间想找人谈天。。。。。所以我看了我的电话普几篇。。。。但是，到最后还是放弃这个念头。。。。。我刚刚才发现，原来我没有人可以找。。。我的意识是，原来没人可以帮到我。。。。。也好，好让我能够靠自己出完成我的事。。。不用靠别人。。。凡事要独立。。。不想也不要再找朋友帮忙了。。。利和，寂寞虽然难受。。但是，我相信你能够渡过它。。。

lonely time of me....

Another lonely time of me here at church.... finally i realize that lonely is a good time... a good time to think... a good time to do whatever i wan.... although it is lonely, however, i just started to like it... like to be alone... no one should i trust and no one should i be rely on... coz everything doing by my own... 

i wonder why no people in kk, always doing what it is selfish... driving also selfish... and almost make me in a crash.... the damn big lorry... and what the matter about the law that even the government themselves are those who break the law.. so if they break it, no need being penalty and we as nation have to penalty..? where the justice that they always put on their mouth... damn government... useless stupiak....